Do you know what defeat looks like? Have you ever seen a fully grown
woman assaulted by her husband, being asked by a doctor to strip down
and have her bruises inspected? Have you ever witnessed a 2 week old
baby struggling to breath? Have you ever felt the pain in the shaky
hands of an elderly woman dealing with the recovery of breast cancer, as
well as Parkinson’s disease? I have seen these forms of defeat. But
from defeat I have begun to learn the importance of hope.
I am now in the second week of my internship and I see a variety of
cases every day (which I love)! When we spoke with the woman who had
been assaulted, she had the strength to file a report and go see a
social worker, seeking help and holding hope in her heart. When I
witnessed an innocent young baby taking very fast and shallow breaths,
and watched his parents be told that he must go to the emergency room, I
saw the protection, defiance, and hope in the cradling arms of two
parents. And when we had to perform a physical exam on this elderly
woman who had come alone to the clinic, could barely stand on her own,
had recently had a mastectomy and a lumpectomy, and needed help getting
up onto the bed and removing her clothing, I could see the hope in her
eyes for a better tomorrow.
The best moments I had today were sharing smiles with that elderly
woman, especially because we both spoke very different languages but had
found a way to share our emotions with one another, and speaking with,
shadowing, and learning from our director at the clinic, Sister C (as we
lovingly enjoy calling her). I find I am inspired by this nurse
practitioner as she takes shit from no one, but has a secret and
enormous compassionate side. One of her first questions to our group of
interns was if our families and homes were okay after Hurricane Sandy.
Who even remembers the names of these natural disasters, especially
halfway across the world?
What I feel right now is inspired and hopeful, despite these quick
to assume signs of defeat I have seen. And I’m beginning to believe that
viewing my experiences through this lens is something very important in
South Africa…that despite all the pain and the suffering there is in
this country, people here still believe in God, their communities, one
another, love, hope, trust (truly intangible things) and are creating an
inspirational and hopeful culture that I respect and am only just
beginning to learn from.
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